The Handshake Test: What Your Grip Says About You as a Consultant
Lessons from a consultant who once shook hands a bit too enthusiastically
I still remember my very first consulting training back in 2008, somewhere near Chicago. We were practicing client meetings—all those soft skills you can’t really learn from PowerPoint.
After one exercise, the coach took me aside and said:
“Eetu… try not to break the client’s hand.”
Fair feedback. I don’t think I’m unusually strong—just, let’s say, enthusiastic with my grip.
Years later, during introductions in a partnering company, I actually heard someone’s hand crack.
That was… awkward. To be fair, I used to climb a lot, and apparently grip strength sticks with you.
But over time, I’ve learned that, like most things in consulting, handshakes are really about balance.
Why It Matters More Than You Think
The handshake might seem like a small, outdated ritual—especially in an age of remote meetings, virtual hellos, and the occasional pandemic.
But it still says a lot before you even speak.
In consulting, first impressions matter. A handshake is often your first silent message: “I’m confident, present, and you can trust me.”
Too weak, and it signals hesitation. Too strong, and it looks like you’re trying to win the deal physically.
Somewhere between limp fish and bone crusher lies the sweet spot. Firm, steady, and human.
What a Good Handshake Communicates
A good handshake isn’t about strength, it’s about presence. In consulting, that brief moment sets the tone for everything that follows: trust, confidence, and respect.
Here’s what the right kind of handshake quietly says for you:
🤝 Confidence without dominance. It’s not a contest. You’re building connection, not testing grip strength.
🕊️ Calm energy. Even if you’re nervous, your handshake can project focus and steadiness.
👀 Presence. Look them in the eye. Don’t multitask the moment—this is your micro-introduction.
🕰️ Timing. Two seconds is plenty. It’s a greeting, not an arm-wrestling tournament. And the endless handshake pump? Just awkward.
What It’s Really About
Here’s the truth: it’s not about the handshake itself. It’s about awareness.
If you’re conscious of how you greet people, you’re probably conscious of how you communicate, listen, and lead.
And those same instincts—to sense the other person, to adjust, to connect—are what make you a good consultant.
So whether your handshake is firm or featherlight, the real lesson is the same: pay attention to how you show up.
Final Thoughts
I still have strong fingers—climbers never really lose them.
But these days, I try to save my grip strength for problem-solving, not introductions.
So, next time you meet a client, colleague, or partner, give them the kind of handshake that says:
“I’m here, I’m steady, and I’m listening.”
Just… maybe don’t make them wince.
👉 Have you ever had a handshake moment gone wrong—or hilariously right?
I’d love to hear your stories.
See you next time,
Eetu Niemi
IT Consulting Career Hub 🚀
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